i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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