...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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