He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
