Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Couch. On fire.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize