just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
