I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
