To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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