Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
