that's an acceptable place to lick
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
