So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
