Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Two words: nipple clamps
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