my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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