seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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