there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
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