Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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