Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize