is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
