Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
