you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Randomize
