My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
