There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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