I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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