the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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