all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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