omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....