well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno