was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
is that a dick in a sweater?
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
