I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
