This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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