Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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