also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
