He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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