WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
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