what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
