Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
