oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
