lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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