i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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