worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Randomize
