if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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