I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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