i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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