I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
