Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
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