yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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