On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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