I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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