i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
