I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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