At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
they're like a gay fantastic four
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
