Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
how do flat chested girls get laid?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Randomize
